Relax Is Not My Middle Name

 Like many of you I want to wake up claiming the truth. However, there are some weeks like this one where I have to ask God to remind me He has a purpose. I have to learn to trust him even when I say no to an opportunity that seem like an open door. I don't know about you but like many  of you I want to know God's will. Yet, it can feel so challenging especially when your trying to find the balance of being still.

I am still trying to understand this one. At the same time I know I have to be active which is some of the wisest words God allowed my friend Lesley to share with me which I'm very grateful for. I have also realized how easy it is to let life swallow you! I didn't really take off any time when I got of the plane from New York where I had been serving for a year with a church plant.

So, instead out of all this I let things snow ball. I was so anxious for survival thinking I have to get a job because I need a car, be the responsible adult and etc. I forgot to just (Be).  In fact  this week has really been the first time I feel I have done any debriefing. I'm still  trying to allow this space to happen. However,  I heard a song that may encourage us as we wait for whatever it is we may be waiting.  Hope it will shed some light for someone! What is your reflection? To slow down and be.

Not My Time Frame

 The past few weeks have been a challenge for me as I shared in looking for a job. Its been a very humbling position in remembering to claim joy. This has also been a moment of remembering God is with me! Although it hasn't been easy in transition I can look back at each week seeing where God has provided. I may not have an open door with a job yet but here are some ways my Father has said I am here:

1.  My Church family
2.  A couple asking me to babysit
3.  Transportation from friends so I could put in applications
4. Clean Water
5. A roof over my head
6. Lunch with a friend

I know the list is more but those are the moments I really  am thankful for that I want to take in! I don't know what your struggles may be but let me tell you God is never far. Our answers may not come in our time frame; however we can rest He is working our our behalf. Or so this was my reminder today as I read the Jesus Calling, there were two key phrase that stood with me:

1. I am working on your behalf
2.  If you want to work with  Me,  you have to accept My time frame

 Especially the last phrase because I don't know about you but I love to  move quickly. However, in my case I have been finding myself in having to remember  that the slowness isn't always a bad place. Slowness teaches us to step back to allow God to remind us its in Him we move. No, I don't know  how soon a job will come or if God has another plan but I have the promise He is with me.  I was very much reminded of that from Matthew 1:23 which was the scripture reading tonight from my home church Immanuel as we have been doing Advent. You can click on the click here button which will take you to the video.  What is my reflection? To remember God is with me!



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A Joyful Mindset

 The past few weeks have been a whirl wind for me since I have came home from my internship with New York. I feel as if I can hardly keep up with so many thoughts racing not knowing what is next. The transition to home has been very interesting. There have been joys and there have been challenges. One of my challenges has been finding a job especially because I have never really been in the work world. My experiences I do not regret but its hard to  transition into a mindset  being on the mission field  to real world. If that makes any sense.
I have for one learned a lot  this month I have been here as well through this experience. I went from having a job when I arrived to loosing it because I failed the exam. At first I was very ashamed of it but I realize as painful as it was for me this gives me an avenue to those who have  lost a job before. I also found this to be a place for me to be challenged to pray for those who have families who have no job.
I can't identify with raising a family because I'm still single but I can't personally imagine the  pressure! I am learning to take my challenges as treasures! They don't always feel like treasures but they reallly are gifts because  He uses them for our good.

Romans 8:28
 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose

 This has been my challenge friend because  I have had to learn to remember to praise God even if I don't understand this season that feels like a blur. I can't tell you that I understand how I went from having a  job that I thought was really mine then taken away but I can tell you its for His glory!  Its not easy to always claim it either because it doesn't  always feel glorious not knowing what is next. However, it  is all about mindset my friends. So, I propose a question to us both, " Will you choose a joyful mindset believing its good even when it doesn't look that way?"

So Much More Than A Manger Scene

 The past couple of days I decided to take the book of Luke on. I  know many of us are familiar with it because we have read the Christmas story from it every year but  there are many beautiful connections to the life of Jesus in this book. In  chapter one were reminded through Mary's humility to trust Him and that He is redeemer. (Luke 1:38,68) Then in chapter two we discover He is peace along with our promise of hope. ( Luke 2:14,29-32) He is also the one who makes a way which is what (Luke 3:6-6) tells us.
He is not only our promise of hope but He is the chain breaker (Luke 4:16-19) And His message is meant to be told! (Luke 4:43-44) I'm still journeying my way through but today I thought it would be an appropriate reminder to us all who He is!
The book of Luke doesn't stop at chapter 2 where we discover this baby boy who is about to turn our world upside down!
What is your reflection today?  My reflection is  to remember the Creator I worship. His story is bigger than coming down as a helpless babe. He is the redeemer!

Love

 I know the title is very simple. I know as humans we say I love you a lot  but do we dare to love those who are different then us? I must confess to you that there are times I really struggle to be compassionate to those who are different then me.I may not outwardly say it, however lets face it our inner flesh can take us there at times. If I had to pick my weakness I would say listening. I  find sometimes that if I can't connect with the person that it is easy for me to tune them out. You would say as adults we would of grasped this lesson to because as children were told to love people even though they are different. Yet, how well are we  putting this into action.

 I for one can put this into more action because sometimes I get caught up into me and forget to love those around me. I can be very me centered.  I've even unfortunately been the one to avoid people at times because I knew if we saw each other they would want to talk and I truly wouldn't want to listen because I was on the go.  Yet, Jesus was the opposite. He took time no matter what was on His agenda.

How selfish of me when Jesus has always stopped for me. So, perhaps the reflection is if I want to feel I am valued than how much more do the others desire the same?


1 Peter 2:17
 Honor everyone. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the emperor.

Inner Strenght

 Ephesians 3:16
 That according to the riches of His glory He may grant you to be strengthen with His power through His spirit in your inner being


 The past few months I have been learning what it means to lean in on God has my inner strength. This year in New York has  changed me in ways I can't begin to describe. From every emotional peak my God has been there. I came to New York not really knowing what I was getting myself into. I left a familiar  place as well in people I know. I walked out of a job that  I was really only there for a month.

I watched God provide a place for me to rest my head til I could move into an apartment. God brought me family  even though I have been miles away from my family in Kentucky. He helped me see my strength comes from Him and not me. There have been moments emotionally where I said to, "God are you sure you sent the right girl to the city?"

I learned to let go of leaning on my emotions and  to lean in on His thoughts because my heart is weak. New York has made me a stronger person in many ways. Especially in the last few weeks where I just felt like my mind & heart was weak.  I have also been reminded in small ways such as singing " This Little Light Of Mine" with my supervisors son that everyday we have a choice to let our light shine. We can choose to let our emotions rule us or let Christ be our inner strength. So, what seems impossible or  may  make you feel weary are actually great moments because they draw you back into God!

I am thankful He has used New York in my life to continue making the person He is sculpting and  rather were sent to New York or  life's circumstances seem daunting know that we have to choice to lean in.